Help with Primary Vaginism and Secondary Vaginism

Article by Denise Douglass

What is Vaginism?

Vaginism is a condition in which an attempt to insert something into a woman's vagina causes the muscles surrounding the vagina to tighten, and to clamp shut, making penetration painful or impossible.

Vaginism can affect sexual intercourse as well as gynaecological examinations and even the use of tampons.

Vaginism is involuntary, and can be compared to any other reflex action where the body closes up as a reflex, like when the eye blinks if something approaches it.

In vaginism, although the closing of the vagina is involuntary, it is often due to a learned response to pain, that is to say, the woman expects pain, or remembers previous painful experiences, or simply imagines that penetration will be painful, and the vaginism reflex occurs. Vaginism can be helped very successfully.

Woman with vaginism can get caught in a 'catch 22' situation. They subconsciously expect, or fear pain, and the muscles tighten up. If penetration is then attempted, it can be painful simply because the muscles are tight. What happens then, is that the pain then subconsciously re-inforces the fear, tells the subconscious that it was right to fear the pain, and it can cause an even stronger response the next time.

Primary Vaginism

Primary vaginism is the name given to the condition when the woman has never been able to have sexual intercourse.

Primary vaginism is often discovered in the teenage years, when the girl tries to use tampons, or goes for an internal examination and finds it to be extremely uncomfortable. This fear of pain then causes an anxiety which will bring with it the conditioned reflex response of closing upwhenever the woman then subsequently attempt intercourse.

Secondary Vaginism

Secondary vaginism is the name given to the condition where the woman has been able to achieve penetration in the past, but develops vaginism after some time.

Treatment for vaginism is often easier for women with secondary vaginism than it is for women with primary vaginism, simply because the woman is aware that penetration without pain is possible.

How to overcome vaginism

The one thing we'd like to say right from the start, is don't worry, you CAN overcome vaginism when you know how.

What we've found over the years, is that there are a few simple techniques that you can use to overcome vaginism.

Sometimes, people who have vaginism can often feel quite out of control and negative about things, because it can sometimes feel like they're stuck with it, and there's nothing that can be done about it (which of course there is!).

So the first thing to understand if you're looking to get over your vaginism, is that that there IS something that can be done, and even that in itself can help you feel a bit more in control right from the start.

So, as we say, don't worry... we've found over the years, that there are a few simple techniques that you can use to overcome vaginism... you CAN overcome vaginism when you know how... it just might be that you need someone to show you how!

Next: What techniques can you use to overcome vaginism?

I visited Denise mainly at the Hitchin branch about a problem I had struggled with for many years - vaginism.

Really hypnotherapy was one of my last hopes. With such a personal problem you need someone who is going to make you feel at ease & able to just say whatever comes into your head without judging you.

Denise did just that! She is such a friendly, down to earth lady, a pleasure to have met.

Even just on a general level I feel a lot calmer, more positive & can take things in my stride more.

Oh, & my husband is pretty pleased with the outcome too!

Thank you so much Denise!! We did it!!
-xxx-

A vaginism client from Mill Hill, London

When I first contacted the practice I really didn't know what to expect and felt that I'd got to the end of the road - if this didn't work then that was 'it'. The crippling pain of vaginism would be there to stay and I'd just have to accept it. From the first email to the last session I was treated with complete understanding and sympathy, which after getting on for a decade of not being taken seriously or just simply being 'dismissed' was a really welcome relief.

I still don't understand completely how hypnotherapy works, all I can say from my own experience is that with such a personal problem talking about it is really not easy - whether it's to another female or not. However if you can get over the first hurdle of picking up the phone to make the first appointment you've made huge progress.

Luckily for me it's worked and my husband and I are not only very pleased but also very grateful. Hopefully soon we'll be able to start trying for a family, something which just three months ago was completely out of the question.

Thank you again for all your help, I'm now pain free and feeling great!!

...a vaginism client from Burnham-on-Crouch

I was surprised how successfully hypnotherapy sorted out a lot of problems for me. I initially went in for hypnotherapy to treat Vaginismus. After about 5 sessions, intimacy with my partner improved as I was less apprehensive.

I have always been a tense person, possibly volatile at times, but hypnotherapy helped me to feel less stressed and anxious. This is the most chilled out I have been ever. I am thankful that I found Avon Hypnotherapy as it has helped me to move forward.

Thank you so much
Amanda

Amanda from London - Ex-Vaginism sufferer

I had vaginismus, something that I thought I suffered alone, so I googled it and found Denise;  I thought hypnotherapy sounded interesting and worth trying.

I’m so glad I did because Denise has helped me to change my approach to problems (and life) entirely.  

She introduced me to ‘Changing Limiting Beliefs’ which has helped me to take control of the problem, create manageable goals and alter my thinking.  

As a result, I have overcome this issue. I’m so grateful to her.

Thanks for all your help,

Angharad

Angharad from London - Ex-Vaginism sufferer

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